No Kids. Not Ever.

I recently met a young lady and we had a nice long conversation over the phone. I liked her vibe when we met (she was refreshingly pleasant and happy) and even more on the phone. She liked my resume, but told me she was waiting for the one big flaw, ASIDE from my obvious non-desire to commit to a woman right now. Turns out, the biggest turn off to her, and most of the A-Team and mains before her, is that I don’t want any children, EVER!!!

There is nothing wrong with children, I used to be one, some women would say I still act like one. I think having a child is the best thing that has ever happened to a lot of people. It’s made them a better person, it has taught them to be more responsible, mature, caring, giving, and most of importantly, loving. Children are a blessing, just one I don’t want.

I am not a monster. Kids adore me. I love them equally; just as long as I can return them to their owner. I was in the delivery room with Diamond when she had her baby, I bonded with Canton’s daughter, I loved Pink (TheMrs niece). I love my super bad 5 yr old niece. I have a god son, who’s name I still can’t pronounce, that is my lil’ mans for life. I even had a neighbor I used to mess with the flyest 4 yr old son in the country, who always wanted to box and run around the kitchen, which I thought was fun, until it was time to play grown up games with his mother.

Back to the conversation with my lady friend. “You’re handsome, tall, about your business. I was sitting here thinking to myself, ‘what’s wrong with this guy?’ Is he crazy. Does he have a small peen peen? and that’s it, you don’t want any children,” she said sadly. I could tell by the change in her tone, she was obviously disappointed. It seems like she would been more concerned about the fact that I already have a main girl, or that I have no desire to commit to her to even get to the point of possibly having a child.

I had this same issue with Jabs. She wanted children, period. No exceptions. Maybe it’s the way they are raised, possibly the way human beings, or people in general are wired. My grandma demands that I have some great grandbabbies for her, as if she doesn’t have enough already. My “church going” uncle thinks that any time you ejaculate and don’t use your sperm for procreation, you’re offending God, a topic in which we do not see eye to eye on. In society, you’re supposed to be married and make children. Well society…………… NO.

I enjoy my life. Not the ultra-sex’d out part, but the freedom of it all. The ability to go anywhere and do anything, whenever I want to. Matter of fact, on some self-pride stuff, I enjoy saying I’m single, working, and pursuing a masters degree…with no baby momma. Changing diapers? ewww. Waking up to crying at 3 a.m.? Nope. Fighting off little male versions of me who try to undress my hypothetical daughter when she’s 16, NO THANK YOU.

Children Are Our Future. Yup, they sure are. Thankfully, there are enough young black males out here without a positive male role model in their lives (my love life need not be represented here), that I can still join one of the 1,000 organizations for black youth and fulfill my obligation to man kind. Charitable works and helping out in the community are a must to any male who calls himself a man, so I definitely plan on doing that, I just don’t want any children of my own.

I’d be lying if I said I never thought about Bubbles laying in a hospital bed with her hair looking crazy and my baby in her tummy. Standing back taking pictures that she’ d hate a year later. Or that when I thought themrs was pregnant, I didn’t rub her stomach and kiss it. Or that I can’t visualize lil undresser coming down the court, crossing your son over, and dunking on someone’s nephew…only to graduate from Harvard and to have a family of his own. But as one of my old hoodrats used to say, “and then I woke up.”

I’m in the very small group of people around this country who has no desire to have any children. I would have had a vasectomy by now, but it is extremely hard to find a licensed doctor who will give me one, seeing as though I’m pre-30 with no children. I guess, if I really didn’t want any children, I’d stop having sex. Good luck with that. Like most of us, if there was a child for everytime I bust a nut; forget a football team, I’d have a league of players…and cheerleaders.

So what will happen if a woman gets pregnant by me? I’d cry. Then depending on who she is, I’d ask her what she wanted to do. I’m not supporting any abortions anymore, so if it was a woman that I think I could be with platonically, I’d start trying to work my way towards getting ready for that mindset. If we tried to be together and it didn’t work, that’s fine. Now if it was one of these women I don’t really care for outside of sex, I’d cry again, and call my grandma so she could curse me out…then cry again. Not to mention I would have lost Bubbles and any other woman that was worth having around because I just knocked up some stupid chick who will only bring drama to their lives. Shit, that sounds like enough for me to really get to know who I’m sticking my magnums in….kind of. In the end, I will try to the be the best father I could be. Ultimately, working on getting my life in order defined by what I feel is right in my heart. Child support is a lame way out, I believe in financial, emotional, spiritual, and physical support. Shit, you just have to be there. Hopefully that day doesn’t come, but given my lifestyle, it’s a definite possibility. Perhaps the best thing for me to do is to find a woman who absolutely does not want children, uses birth control, practices safe sex religiously, and have sex with her for the rest of my life.

Are there any folks out there like myself, who don’t want children…EVER? Do people look at you funny when you tell them that? Has anyone ever considered giving their child up for adoption? Would your stance on keeping the child depend on who you got pregnant/got pregnant by?

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Author: The Undresser

Black, Single, and Not Looking. Enjoys grilled salmon, cold glasses of water, and grocery shopping at Meijer. Likes women with nice ass to waist ratios, Reese Cups, and watching Real Time with Bill Maher. Dislikes cigarettes, littering, and disobedient children.

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